The construction outside my bedroom continues. Yesterday i walk outside in my new sweater  and the construction worker across the street waves at me and says good morning and i don't respond and he says hello? hello? hello? i'm trying to talk to you. but i'm still drunk and i have to go to the doctor's office but then they are dumping a giant pile of dirt on the street and i stop and look and they laugh at me because i love the pile of dirt. they wave and i wave. Do you think they only do this because they can see me in my bedroom? i thought my curtains were opaque. they took my blood at the doctor my new doctor who's building is so decrepit and it reminds me of an asylum because of the skylight and the thick paint but my girl doctor and my girl nurse are nice to me when i say i'm not good at this when they take my blood and she finds out i wasn't lying because i passed out. and as a reward i buy underwear and eyeliner. this happened because i missed the saved event sponsored by bar bianchi because i was at bar bianchi with my babysitter and her boyfriend. justin comes and then we go to funny bar and my babysitter's boyfriend says those words in crayon on the funny bar table cloth and my babysitter is thinking 'WTF' and Melina is there with her friend sissy who lives in northampton and tells me to text her when i'm there. she has a flip phone and asks if i remember how to use it when i'm texting myself on her phone and i say yes but it's not working. me and justin at the ps1 party immediately run into tony and emmett like every day seems like. too drunk to remember my burger too drunk to remember justin's burger which is the type of drunk that makes you sad because you can't get rid of it. and now it's friday. going to the health gossip event that me and emma were supposed to chef for but we were scattered and didn't but our names our on the list thank you and we are sorry. isabel is out of town. i need to email satya i wonder if i will ever braid his hair. ran this morning and cleaned my room then house. my body is my house and my room is my house too and then there is my real house..all need maintenance.