I am only thinking about running and cleaning and shopping. i think i have said this before or it's deja vu. in my dream last night isabel's date moved upstairs and i was cleaning the apartment before they arrived because i had been storing my junk there. when string bean is mad he eats the plants he knows will make him throw up and then he throws up on my bedroom floor to wake me up. yesterday i bought one dress and two "shirts".. my mom and dad are coming in one hour and we are going to eat salad and sea buckthorn tonic at emma's job with justin and sam. last night it felt like i was on meth but i just wanted to prove a point so i made eleven cakes two banana breads 1 bread pudding 2 blondies matcha cookies. i've been wondering about objects whose shape control your behavior or maybe i should say encourage. a plate for two people sitting next to each other (must not be. afraid to touch). thinking of projects to do when i go home so i don't feel despair. haircut, paris movie, run, collagen cubes, computer work, buy my loved ones presents, watch youtube. maybe i'll go to the bar with my cousin and my babysitter.