I feel sorry for making my mom scared for crying so much when she did something terrible on accident. I hope it doesn’t hurt to be inside the landfill (i know it does). my dad says what’s wrong with your arms but that’s just they way they are. it’s 3:40am how do we get home this keeps happening i guess it's "fun". me and sargent ran into julia on the train. sitting across from us. green apple white claw surge in my waterbottle. the bartender hands me the bottle ofvodka to "look at" (he looks the other way). tell me when. they fixed the hole in my ceiling but i can already see it coming back and i sort of miss it and maybe wish it comes back. nico is coming. The man on the train is inspirational double yankees hat double lakers t-shirt pants say gucci but chanel logo. i've been trudging. something killed off the old me that went left right left right left right. and now i trudge and i drag my feet and i stop and stand still and wait for me to remember something. string bean eats hair ties when i'm not looking.